Beyonce performs during her World Tour 2009. Photo by hassy via Flickr.

I didn’t watch the Grammy’s.

It’s not that I didn’t want to. Even though I disagree with the Grammy’s, sometimes they’ve got some pretty neat-o performances.

Sometimes.

Remember when Kanye and Jamie Foxx did Gold Digger? Epic! Remember Swagga Like Us with the Rap Pack? M.I.A. made pregnancy look cooler than Juno managed to after that one. And then Radiohead played a bunch of drums, which was super neat.

Anyways, I have no idea what happened at the Grammy’s this weekend other than the 2 minutes I saw in passing of Fergie on stage wearing some S & M gear, which she didn’t pee in, unfortunately. The one thing I did hear though, was that Beyoncé swept up, winning a record 6 awards, the most ever to go to a single female performer in one night.

And you know what? She freaking earned all 6 of those Grammys. All of ‘em. She deserves to string up all those Grammys on a necklace and wear it around her home as Jay-Z worships the ground she walks on. Or just sits there on a big upholstered chair smoking a cigar lazily as he is fed gold encrusted grapes from his exotic trained-monkey butlers. Or, you know, whatever he does when not running the world.

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After years of mediocrity, it seems that the Grammy Awards are finally getting their act together. Long abandoned by most serious music listeners as a legitimate source for the best music of the year, they had become more of an awards show for your parents’ favorite music of the year. “How To Dismantle an Atomic Bomb,” the craptastic latest U2 disc won best album in 2005, and “Boulevard of Broken Dreams,” a mediocre Green Day track won best record. The Dixie Chicks had the best album honor in 2006–get where I’m coming from?

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